In an era where we can’t get kids to participate in many activities, why are we cutting kids out of opportunities they want to succeed at?
This is the question I have been grappling with since Wednesday afternoon, when my 8 year old daughter told me she didn’t get a speaking part in her school musical. Emma tried out for over 10 speaking parts, and didn’t get one-no parts available for her. She was crushed, mortified, heartbroken, and I, for the first time, realized what it was like to be the kid who didn’t make it. It still brings tears to my eyes today as I write this thinking about how here is another opportunity for us to do right by kids, and we limit those who can have a role. Why in third grade can’t there be a role for everyone who wants one? Is third grade a cut sport now? Is third grade the time that we are telling kids, “hey, you are not quite good enough, sorry.”
Growing up as a competitive athlete, heck, I am competitive in about every thing, I really can’t say I ever remember the feeling of being cut out of something-sure when I was older, but not as an 8 year old. I was the kid picked to be on the Dodgeball team, Red Rover team, soccer, volleyball, etc… I never tried out for a play, but would rather have been behind the scenes, and there was always a place for me there. I was cut from my college volleyball team, but I was ready to be done playing then. I was ok with my career being over after playing competitive volleyball for many years.
Wednesday with Emma was the first time I felt like what it was to be the kid no one wanted. (It was so hard being her parent then when all I wanted to do was yell and scream composing some really nasty email to the person who denied my child her heart’s desire). And it made me think a lot about my own classroom. How I am extending learning opportunities and chances to perform, succeed, challenge to everyone; not just those that always get those roles? How am I making a place for everyone in my community of learners? How am I making sure kids don’t feel cut out of my class and making sure they feel as though they have a role?
I have always supported cuts in activities. It helps kids understand that we are all gifted in different ways. This is the conversation that Emma’s step dad, dad and I had with her. She has succeeded in many other ways: art, swimming, soccer. But after our conversation, I had a lot of questions about what we are doing to kids. I am wondering, when did elementary school become a cut sport? When did third grade become the deciding factor in whether Emma is good enough to speak in front of the school? When did third grade become the time for my daughter to start feeling as though she isn’t as “good” a kid as those that did receive roles?
I am not trying to demean the school’s choices; I am sure all those that received speaking roles will be fabulous, but at what point did we decide to limit the participants in school? At what point did we decide that 8 year olds don’t get to do something creative and important to them? (Everyday Emma came home and talked about her excitement over waiting to find out who got a role). If everyone wants a chance to stand up and participate, why would we say no? Why is third grade the new cut sport?
11 comments:
Not everyone needs to win (especially if we finally removed competition from schools), but schools need to either offer enough dramatic productions that anyone who wants to can participate (surely, drama is an educational activity) or they can rethink the entire enterprise.
Take a look at what my friend's primary school in Australia does EVERY YEAR - http://www.ssps.vic.edu.au/events.html 5th & 6th graders go camping for a week, write and compose a musical and then THE ENTIRE SCHOOL plays a role in the production. They do the play multiple nights so multiple kids can perform behind the curtain and on stage. This is what a PUBLIC school can do.
I've decided to amend my comments from the first paragraph. If school sports were less competitive, more kids could participate and it would cost a whole lot less. Even better idea - get competitive sports out of school, like most other countries, reduce the cost and increase participation.
Grinnell College, allows any student who wishes to be on any sports team and makes all of their extra-curricular activities equally welcoming and diverse.
Hey Anne. I grew up doing theater and in music (played tuba, and still do). It is very important to get kids to want to stand up and express themselves in a crowd, and the theater and music experiences are more limited now than ever. It is tragic.
What I have been doing to try and increase child participation in music and performance is by running a family karaoke Friday nights at a pizza place nearby. We have several regular families now, as well as several folks from a special needs home that also come. It is really a fantastic experience where no one is judged on their performance and it allows for your own expression of the song. I would try to find something along those lines in the community or encourage that type of out of the box thinking for a fund raiser night at your school. Trust me, you have not heard "Don't Stop Believin" until it has been done by a group of 5th grade girls (thank you, Glee).
Here is a sample of empowering a child with a stage and music in an environment where they chose their song...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8cW8zu5uSs
Hi Anne!
While doing a search on teaching A Whole New Mind, I found you on http://thefischbowl.blogspot.com/2008/01/think-pink-whole-new-learning.html. I saw your Smith 9H 07-08 blog and was very impressed. I am going to be starting a unit on the book very soon with my 8th graders, and I was wondering if you'd be willing to share any of your unit plan, materials, lessons, assignments, etc. I would also love to hear some of your feedback on how the unit went. I would be eternally grateful for your help!
Please email me at jstechmann@kipplynn.org
thank you so much!
jessica
Well, I think you know how careful I've always been around you with your competitive nature, but I think you're seeing some of what my concerns are with our emphasis on competition in this country. I acknowledge that competition exists, and that there are places where "cuts" probably have to be made. But it's not 3rd grade, and I would suggest you could make a strong case for it not to be high school, either.
I have a blog post simmering in my head that I'll probably never write, but the basic theme is that one of our major problems is that our "leaders" view the world through a hyper-competitive lens, and a lens that's distorted because they've always been the "winner."
What would our schools - and our world - look like if instead we viewed them through a cooperative lens, and that we only thought of competition as with oneself?
Gary-
I couldn't agree more about schools offering more for students so that all students can be a participant in where their interests are.
I am not sure about competitive sports being out of school. Being one of those competitive three sport athlete in school, I loved the change of pace from what was going on in my classroom. I know Alfie Kohn has written a considerable amount about competition in school, but I still see athletics as being an important part of why some of those hard to reach kids come to school. I think if you took it out of school, many would find somewhere else to go, or wouldn't come at all.
James- I love the idea of family karaoke night. What a great way to give kids and families another outlet!
What was interesting about this whole problem with Emma, was that when I talked to her teacher about why Emma didn't get a speaking part, it wasn't because she didn't read well, but that she didn't act the part.
I thought to myself after that conversation, isn't that what you are supposed to be teaching them after they get the part?
Jessica- thanks for your feedback about AWNM- I will get the entire unit sent via email sometime in the next week.
Thanks for your interest.
Karl- as always, you have pushed my thinking. As far as your question, "What would our schools - and our world - look like if instead we viewed them through a cooperative lens, and that we only thought of competition as with oneself?" I think we are shifting to a more cooperative phase. I definitely see it in my classroom, and in my colleagues classrooms. I think what worries me more and more is what I see with my kids and athletics.
Growing up, I could play in our neighborhood, play multiple sports, participate in theater, etc... Now-a-days, my own kids can barely get their homework accomplished by the time we have to eat dinner and get them to bed. Emma has had teammates move to competitive soccer at third grade, Jackson has had teammates move to competitive basketball at third grade, and every class they are in is measured by their MAP test scores. Everything in their elementary school seems to be a competition. And more so, the parents are supporting it.
An additional note for all of you that are interested, Emma came home yesterday with a note that she is getting a part (2 lines!) in the school musical- why? Because someone who didn't want a speaking part, but was assigned one anyway, wanted to give up his role as student #18. Go Emma a.k.a Student #18!
Anne,
Congratulations first of all to student #18!
I just read one of your most recent posts and have to ask, "Why do you have honors English class?" Is English the new cut sport?
Schools would be such better places for learning if they removed competition and committed to forward progress for every kid.
I suspect that many of the challenges you find with your class for boys is that they feel like academic losers when such winning and losing should not exist.
As for interschool competitive sport. The USA leads the world in this. More intramural, in or out of school, would allow more kids to participate and you could dramatically reduce the cost by using less expensive coaches from the community.
Related story - In Australia, all competitive sport is community-based. My friend Anna is 14. She enjoys playing basketball, but is not fanatical about it. She plays year-round and that requires one 60-minute practice and one game of similar length per week.
Anna just became coach of a 9 year-old team, because she was asked to do so. You play, you coach, you give back. Lots of kids get to play and the coach doesn't cost the community $80,000/year :-)
Gary-
Thanks for the comment. Emma was overjoyed to get any part!
The reason Honors English is a cut sport is not because we haven't tried to make open for all. We have auditions to get in, just like tryouts and for many years we have had the discussion of just doing away with auditions letting in anyone who wants. I guess we just haven't taken the big jump. We talk about it every year, and I guess we all come back to the idea of separating those with the grades and ambition versus those who don't. We have let in kids before who haven't scored as well, but have great teacher recommendations. I guess its time I bring up the subject again.
With my all boys class, I do remove the competition for the most part. Students can only earn an A, B, C or F in my class and they have six weeks to redo any assignment to make sure they are turning in quality work representative of their learning rather than last minute work. This is the continuation of my grad school work with you.
I am not sure about the coaches salary bit. Many of our coaches here get paid pennies on the hour for the time they spend helping kids. We definitely don't pay for high salaries!
I wonder though, if you took the sports out of school, how many kids would still go to school? We don't have hockey here, but kids that play hockey still come to school. However, we offer every other sport known to man. Knowing two of my three brothers, they wouldn't have gone ot school if hockey wasn't part of the school. Hockey is what kept them grade focused.
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